AUBURN HILLS, Mich. - As we analyze every aspect of the Eastern Conference Finals — from the top of Shaquille O’Neal’s thigh bruise all the way down to the bottom of Shaquille O’Neal’s thigh bruise — here’s a fun one to ponder:

What if the Detroit Pistons had Dwyane Wade?

Hey, moron. Leave the super-idiotic trade proposals to talk-radio.

No, it’s a serious question. In the summer of 2003, the Pistons had the No. 2 pick in the NBA draft, thanks to a long-forgotten trade of Otis Thorpe. Cleveland had the No. 1 pick and took some guy named LeBron.

Wade was on the board. So were Carmelo Anthony, Chris Bosh and Kirk Hinrich — impact players, all of them. The Pistons chose Darko Milicic instead.

Now, Milicic has become something of a national punchline, but forget that for a moment. Milicic is only 19, and some of us still think it is way too early to sew “BUST” on the back of his jersey.

When the Pistons made the pick, they already had Ben Wallace, Tayshaun Prince, Chauncey Billups and Rip Hamilton — 80 percent of the best starting five in basketball. They would acquire Rasheed Wallace a few months later.

So what if you add Wade to the mix? What if you add his freakish ability to get to the basket, his everybody-else-is-in-slow-motion quickness?

What do you think, Joe Dumars?

“If we had drafted Dwyane Wade, I don’t think we could have had any more team success than we did,” said Dumars, the Pistons’ president. “That hypothetical question would probably have more depth or meaning to it if we had came up short. You can always play the what-if game then.”

This is Dumars’ ultimate counter-argument: the Pistons won last year’s NBA title. They have a great shot to win again. That is the point of this exercise. Great players are supposed to be a means to an end.

“I’ll give you a prime example of what I’m talking about,” Dumars said. “People don’t question the Houston Rockets for passing on Michael Jordan. They question the Portland Trail Blazers. Why is that? Because (Houston) won the championship.

“When you pass on a guy who turns out to be a superstar player, like Dwyane Wade has become, the moral of the story is: you better win a world championship. Otherwise, you constantly get questions about it. You never hear, ‘Houston passed on Michael Jordan.’ They won a world championship.

“Portland? You hear about Sam Bowie.”

This is true.

But let’s talk about it anyway.

What if the Pistons had Wade? Let’s assume they would still swing the trade for Wallace — there is no way of knowing for sure, but it’s more fun to simply add Wade to the current Pistons.

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As a Piston, Wade would obviously not be lighting up playoff opponents for 40 points — he would have to share time with Billups and Hamilton. But Wade, Billups and Hamilton are team-oriented enough that we can figure they would all get along. And the Pistons, as great as they are, would be even better.

Dumars won’t say it, but it’s safe to assume he never thought Wade would be this good this soon. The Pistons didn’t give much thought to drafting him. Neither did Denver, for that matter. Wade was the fifth pick in the draft, and there was minimal outrage that he fell that far. Heck, a lot of people argued that the Heat should have taken T.J. Ford.

If anything, this conversation shows how obsessed we are with superstars — too obsessed, maybe, especially with young superstars.

Look at the top five picks of that draft: James, Milicic, Anthony, Bosh, Wade. James and Wade are superstars. Anthony obviously has that potential. So does Bosh.

Milicic has done nothing. Yet he is the one with the championship ring.

But if we’re going to get on Dumars for passing on Wade, let’s be honest with ourselves:

Last year, Anthony was showered in more superlatives than Wade. And Dumars had to answer questions all season about passing on Anthony.

For the first few months after the draft, how many people asked Dumars why he took Milicic over Wade?

“Not one,” Dumars said. “Not one. And so, you know, to be fair, that’s the job of the media — generally — to ask the questions after the fact.

“Carmelo has a great year — ‘Why didn’t they draft him?’ We win a championship, Carmelo flatlines, stagnates a little bit — ‘Well, why didn’t you draft (Wade)?’ At some point it becomes a credibility gap for me. Especially after you’ve won a championship. I tend not to take those questions as seriously. That answers all the questions for me.”