Trophies are silly items. They collect dust, take up space, and are usually made of cheap metal.

In the NBA, there are two that matter, despite their cumbersome nature and questionable worth. Let’s call them Larry and Mo.

Larry is the Larry O’Brien Trophy, which is given to the team that wins the NBA Finals. Even though it is clunky and useful primarily for cracking walnuts, it represents the pinnacle of team play, camaraderie and unselfishness in the game of basketball.

Mo, the other hunk of sought-after hardware, is the Maurice Podoloff Trophy, which goes to the league’s most valuable player. It is emblematic of individual excellence, and with it comes the unofficial title of The Man.

So which trophy do you think Kobe Bryant and Shaquille O’Neal will be obsessed with during the 2004-05 NBA season?

If you answered Larry, you are wrong, and as punishment you will have to spend one week as the Portland Trail Blazers’ image consultant, or as Ben Wallace’s barber.

No, this upcoming NBA season will have many storylines, but the one that will capture the nation’s fancy and persist in a high-profile way is the duel between Kobe and Shaq for possession of Mo. It will be intense, nasty, contentious and brazen, and the level of discord between the two former Laker teammates during their pursuit of personal gain and vindication will make the people on “The Apprentice” look like “The Wiggles.”

In the usual scenario, most professional basketball players eventually tire of seeking individual glory, mature and develop perspective, understand that the real satisfaction is in winning a championship as a team, and sublimate their own egos for the common good of the franchise.

Not these guys. For one, Kobe and Shaq have already won three championships together as Lakers, in 2000, 2001 and 2002. Also, Shaq has had his hands on Maurice Podoloff once already (the trophy, not the late former commissioner), in 2000, although he did it with Kobe playing an important supporting role, which surely gnaws at him.

This will be the first time since the two were thrust together in an unholy alliance by Jerry West in 1996 that they will be apart, and will be rivals on opposite teams.

And you can bet your nest egg that each will be on a crusade this season to prove that he is better — not to mention more valuable — than the other.

The Most Valuable Player of 2004-05? Forget Tim Duncan. Forget Kevin Garnett. Forget LeBron James, Jermaine O’Neal, Tracy McGrady, Allen Iverson or any other star candidate. Kobe and Shaq already are the frontrunners, because they want it more than any of their peers, and they’ll campaign tirelessly for it.

Bryant got his way. He now has total control of the Lakers. Owner Jerry Buss put Kobe in charge. In order to do so, he had to expunge anyone who would ever conflict with the 26-year-old superstar. Phil Jackson was fired, Shaq was traded, and the rest of the veterans scattered – Gary Payton was traded, Rick Fox was dealt but then retired, Derek Fisher signed with Golden State, Karl Malone is injured and probably will retire also.

Now Kobe can take all the shots he wants. He can put up gaudy numbers, and none of the other Lakers can squawk about it, lest they be dispatched to some remote NBA outpost where the courtside seats aren’t lined with movie stars and snowplows roam the streets.

In the Lakers’ first exhibition game on Tuesday, fans got a taste of the post-breakup Lakers. Kobe scored 35 points on 13-of-21 shooting. Only one other Laker, Slava Medvedenko, posted double figures (12). It doesn’t take a professor of statistics and probability to conclude that Bryant not only will lead these anemic Lakers in scoring, but he has a superb chance of being the Pete Maravich or Dominique Wilkins of his era by leading the entire NBA in scoring.

Bryant will be in an “I’ll show you” mode all season long, and it will result in his having an astounding statistical season. But the most valuable player? That usually goes to someone who is valuable. If the Lakers stink this year, or even if they make the playoffs but get ousted early, Bryant’s numbers will be perceived as meaningless.

Also, Bryant is still dealing with lots of bad PR. He is the Leona Helmsley of pro hoops. Other players don’t like him because he’s selfish, arrogant, aloof, and because he ratted on Shaq to the fuzz. The media has picked up on the anti-Kobe undercurrent, and they are unlikely to reward Kobe for the ego-driven coup d’ etat that put the Lakers’ franchise at his feet.

That brings us to Shaq. Humble, self-deprecating, supremely dedicated, sensitive to the feelings of others — these are terms that will never be used in association with Shaquille O’Neal.

He is now the center for the Miami Heat, which is perfect for him. Unlike the West, where occasionally a strong and talented big man would oppose him, he will go through the Eastern Conference like he goes through supper. Because he wants the world to know that the Lakers made a grievous error in trading him, he has lost weight and whipped himself into shape. He is primed for a gargantuan season.

As opposed to Bryant, O’Neal will be perceived as most valuable. Whereas the Lakers will be much worse this year, the Heat should be much better. Granted, Miami ripped up a rising squad when it sent Lamar Odom, Brian Grant and Caron Butler to L.A. as the price for obtaining Shaq. But Shaq has two talented players in Dwyane Wade and Eddie Jones for support, and besides, the offense will consist of feeding the ball to Shaq, feeding the ball to Shaq, and feeding the ball to Shaq.

The Heat is in the East, where there are two excellent teams in the Detroit Pistons and Indiana Pacers, and then everybody else. Behind Shaq, Miami likely will finish third in the conference. If the Heat loses in the conference semifinals while the Lakers either fail to make the playoffs or are eliminated in the first round, it will vindicate Shaq — even though Miami got to the conference semis last year, too. Shaq will be PERCEIVED as the reason for Miami’s success, and that’s all that matters.

In the campaign for MVP, Shaq has another huge edge over Kobe: He has a much bigger mouth. He has already taken shots at Kobe on a rap song he recorded, and in the press. He will spend the entire 2004-05 season yukking it up with the media and reminding everyone how dominant he is. The media, in turn, will swallow it whole, and then cast their MVP votes for him.

Kobe will avoid engaging in public spitting matches with anyone (and that list will probably grow; recently Ray Allen of the Seattle SuperSonics took shots at him, joining Phil Jackson and Shaq). He will try to low-key it while taking the high road.

But this feud is a lot like a presidential campaign. If Candidate A is attacking and Candidate B absorbs the attacks without fighting back, then Candidate B is perceived as weak. In this paradigm, Kobe Bryant is Candidate B.

There will be other topics of interest during this NBA campaign. Will McGrady flourish with Yao Ming in Houston? Will Steve Francis, Cuttino Mobley and rookie Dwight Howard surprise everyone in Orlando? Just how awful will the Charlotte Bobcats be? Which Trail Blazer will run afoul of the law next?

But when it comes to trophies, there are only two worth mentioning. Larry will be fought over by the Minnesota Timberwolves, San Antonio Spurs and Detroit Pistons. Mo will be pursued with even more vigor by Kobe and Shaq.