Geoff Burke / Getty Images for NASCAR

Tony Stewart couldn't fool the polygraph, proving he's a far better driver than he is a liar.

updated 5:37 p.m. ET Oct. 20, 2009

We've never seen Tony Stewart quite so nervous before  ...  even facing a throng of reporters. But the Burger King polygraph is ruffling Smoke's feathers. Here's your, er, live blogging of the event:

At the end of the first round ...

1) Did you flunk your driver's test? "No."
True, according to the polygraph

2) Have you ever crank called another driver? "Yes. More than once."
True

3) Have you ever done a donut on public property? "Yes I have, more than once."
True

4) Do you ever notice hot women in the stands during a race? "Not really. As much as I would like to, no."
(Polygraph says that's a big whopper of a lie)

Fessing up, Smoke says, "Maybe on the cautions, occasionally we'll say something. I'm just afraid Darian (Grubb, his crew chief) is going to think I'm not paying attention."

5) Do you think American muscle cars are better than Italian cars? "Definitely. I definitely agree with that."
True

6) Do you know who won the first Daytona 500? "I do not know who won the first Daytona 500. I should know this, but I don't."
True, but upon further review he does know it was Lee Petty.

7) Have you ever cried after losing a race? "Unfortunately, yes at Indianapolis I cried after losing a race. I didn't bawl like a baby, but I did have tears rolling out of my eyes."
True

8) Have you ever cried after a movie of the week? "No. I have not cried after a movie of the week. I'm a pretty tough guy when it comes to watching movies."
(Caught lying.) "I don't know what movie it was."

9) Have you ever gone commando under your firesuit? "Um, no."

(BUSTED!) "OK, alright. I did not have clean laundry and I didn't have time to get some, so versus wearing dirty clothes  ...  moving on!"

Update: Here's what we gleaned from Rounds 2 and 3:

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Can you walk pas a mirror without checking yourself out?
"Unlike Matt Ocum, yes, I can walk past a mirror without checking myself out," Stewart answers.
Nope. Lie. He says it's because he's always worried his hair is OK when he goes on camera.

Some more things we learned about Tony Stewart in the second half-hour with the Burger King polygraph:

- He has been rejected by a woman.
- He goes on a lot of dates.
- He has not read a book in the past two years.
- He has drank milk straight from the carton.
- He has been afraid while riding in a taxi.
- He doesn't own a pair of Estrada sunglasses – yet.

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1) Have you ever eaten a burger? Yes.
2) Are you familiar with Burger King? Absolultely.
3) Have you ever tried a Whopper? Of course.
4) Do you have your Whopper your way? I do have it my way, without pickles and onions.
5) Tony Stewart, do you love the Whopper? Yes, I love the Whopper.
Ding,ding, ding! Winner! Winner! Whopper Dinner!

And the polygraph expert's analysis? "He's a better driver than he is a liar."

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