Tom E. Curran • E-mail

Everybody loves candor. With that in mind, the NFL's Week 5 slate is kind of ... meh.

No five-star specials like last week, no legendary player vs. legendary franchise grudge matches. Things will emerge. They always do.

But for now, here’s your lineup of stories to watch.

1. Hoody vs. Hoody
There’s not a person on the planet that figured the Patriots would go into Denver with a 3-1 record ... and be looking up at the Broncos in the overall standings.

The storylines in this one are stacked up like cord-wood. There’s New Hoody vs. Old Hoody (Broncos coach Josh McDaniels has adopted the Bill Belichick fashion statement previously reserved for leaf-rakers and skaters). There’s Brandon Marshall’s Redemption Song, the catch-and-run touchdown against Dallas on Sunday, and how he reacts in its aftermath.

There’s the Patriots banging up against yet another top-tier defense after already having to deal with the Jets (not so good) and Ravens (much better). There’s the idea that Denver actually IS a top-tier defense. Good stuff in the Rockies.

2. Heel, Eli, Heal
No wheelchair. No crutches. No cast. No walking boot. Just a mild limp for Eli Manning on Monday after he caused stomachs to sink on Sunday by gimping around the backfield like he’d injured his (gulp) Achilles.

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Turns out it's plantar fasciitis, which is Latin for sore freakin’ foot. Fortunately for the 4-0 Giants they have a preudo-bye this week (hosting Oakland), so the strain for Manning should be less than it normally would.

Still, the fixation on Manning’s status and convalescence will be all-consuming in Gotham. In a way, it ought to be. Because as well as brother Peyton’s playing in Indianapolis, Eli — with his eight TDs, two picks and 1,039 yards through the air — has entered the very, very early MVP debate.

3. Desperation Bowls
The Redskins are the ugliest 2-2 team around. Wins over St. Louis and Tampa Bay, a pair of teams that may be winless until Halloween. Losses to the Giants and, ahem, the Lions.

They are so bad that they are actually 4-point underdogs as they head to Carolina to face the winless and shamed Carolina Panthers who are coming off of a bye. Those friendly pregame chat-em-ups you see head coaches engage in? Washington’s Jim Zorn and Carolina’s John Fox will be discussing their respective severance packages.

Then there’s the 0-4 Browns at the 1-3 Bills in a game begging to be blacked out in Western New York. Derek Anderson leads the Bills into Buffalo where Terrell Owens awaits another week of being ignored (“I won’t be ignored!”).

4. Believe in the Bengals
Can Cincinnati turn back three consecutive AFC North opponents? First they took care of the Steelers in the final minute. Then they dispatched them pesky but overmatched Browns. Now they are in Baltimore to face a Ravens team that — for my money — is still the most impressive team in the AFC through the first four weeks.

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Suddenly, it seems the AFC North is the division with the best complement of starting quarterbacks.

5. Hmmm, If It Wasn’t T.O. …
Cue the buzzards out at Valley Ranch. The Cowboys spit the bit again, this time in Denver. The guys who are going to take the heat are the coach, Wade Phillips, whose team got outbrained by a kid coach who looks like he has a paper route, and Tony Romo, who was responsible for more hostile overthrows than the CIA.

Dallas is at Kansas City this week. And while that may seem a layup, don’t you think the Chiefs are licking their chops about dealing with a team in disarray. Again.

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