Michael Ventre

When it comes to the topic of public relations, there are few as sympathetic to the practitioners of that craft as I am. When your job is to shape opinion in the hopes of selling a brand, the terrain can be perilous and terribly unfair. A publicist can do 19 things right, but if he or she botches the 20th, Katy bar the door, because some irate journalist surely will fail to recognize that 19 out of 20 is a darned good batting average.

That’s why I understand on some remote level why the LPGA has decided to perform the Draconian gesture of forcing all of its members to learn English. Public relations are important in any business, but especially one that has a dearth of personable stars. Although Lorena Ochoa, Annika Sorenstam and Paula Creamer are splendid golfers, each is not Tiger Woods. So the LPGA likely believes that by forcing its members to learn English, it will enable players from other lands to better connect with sponsors and media.

This is an example of why public relations is such an inexact science, because this move seems destined to backfire.

I’ve been around many athletes over the years who came from other countries and held down jobs here. Trust me, mastering English so they could mingle with season-ticket holders, sponsors and media has never been their first priority. And yet, many managed to communicate — whether through broken English, or speaking through interpreters, or obscene gestures — and the sports somehow survived. If learning English had been made mandatory, I’m certain they would have done the minimum to comply and then cursed us in their native tongues when the cameras and microphones were gone.

This is a sticky topic, because it comes under the heading of what is absolutely necessary and what isn’t. For instance, if you’re teaching English to children, it’s probably a good idea if you had a handle on the language yourself. If you are a tour guide at Universal Studios in Orlando and all you speak is Farsi, you may have a short career.

But a golfer on the LPGA Tour? That’s shaky ground.

The LPGA seems to be overreacting to a sluggish economy, which is hitting just about everybody hard. Again, I understand public relations. The Tour is particularly worried that a growing number of South Koreans who can’t communicate in English may scare away sponsors or be unable to schmooze them properly during pre- and post-tournament events.

I agree that anyone who comes to the U.S. to work ideally should learn English. It’s a fine language, and knowing it has come in handy for me at the supermarket, the DMV and my local pizzeria, to name but a few. I simply disagree that a penalty should be assessed for anyone who doesn’t get on board.

Reportedly the new rule will apply to those golfers who have been on tour for two years. They will have to pass an English oral evaluation. If they don’t, their Tour memberships could be suspended.

There is an entire illegal immigrant argument in this nation that I’d rather not get into here, but it’s also impossible to ignore. When Americans start targeting foreigners who either can’t or won’t speak English, it creates a perception of bigotry, whether fair or unfair. When Korean players are told they’d better learn English or they can’t play in our reindeer games, such an action leaves a jingoistic odor.

I’d love to see all players on the LPGA Tour speaking English as well as Dame Judi Dench. I just would rather the LPGA strongly encourage its members to learn the language with incentives rather than threaten punishment.

It seems many of the Korean players who responded to the news about the policy didn’t seem to object too strenuously, but then again, what would you expect them to say? They don’t want to rock the boat.