OPINION

By Chuck Gormley

updated 7:38 p.m. ET April 15, 2008

Before we start throwing darts at Rangers pest Sean Avery — and trust me, we will throw some high, hard ones in his direction — we need to explore his unusual relationship with Devils goaltender Martin Brodeur.

Since joining the Rangers 14 months ago, Avery has taken every opportunity to get inside the mask of Brodeur, if not with his words then certainly with an ill-intentioned knee or elbow to the head.

"We're not friends," Avery said of Brodeur. "It's not a (expletive) secret."

Not that Brodeur didn't already know that.

Just last week Brodeur told The Record of Hackensack, N.J., that he was growing tired of Avery's old, worn-out comments about his 2003 divorce.

"It's funny, the lack of new material," Brodeur said. "I told (Avery), 'It's been five years. Find something else.' "

Brodeur said he would love to come back at Avery with a few good one-liners during their Eastern Conference quarterfinal series, but figures his cleverness would somehow get lost in the translation.

"I really don't go back at him at all," Brodeur said. "It's funny. If it would be in French, I would be able to come up with a quick answer. But in English I've got to think about it and then by the time I put it into English he's gone."

OK, now let's give Avery's take on Brodeur.

In an interview with the New York Post last week, Avery described his rosy relationship with Brodeur, which has included several in-the-crease scuffles, in this manner:

"I approach different players in different ways," Avery said. "Some guys I go after verbally, others I don't bother with. ... There are some guys I like as people and don't bother with, and there are a lot I don't.

"Marty? I don't think it's a secret that I'm not a very big fan of his. ...

It's just one of those relationships that's not very pleasant. It's kind of like a bad first date. It started from the first game, and has gone from there."

Or, how about this comment about where he and Brodeur hang out after games?

"We don't travel in the same circles," Avery said. "I don't think he could get into the places I like to go to."

Now that we've laid the foundation of Avery v. Brodeur it's a little easier to understand why Mr. Avery would find it so easy to show such utter disrespect for the future Hall of Fame goaltender — not to mention the game of hockey — by acting like a schoolyard punk Sunday night in the Devils' overtime win against the Rangers in Madison Square Garden, which narrowed the Rangers' lead to two games to one.

If you haven't seen the replays (check out below), imagine being a goalie in a pickup game of street hockey and some jerk from the other neighborhood pulls your ski cap over the eyeholes of your mask while his buddy winds up for a slap shot.

Essentially, that's what Avery did when he parked himself face-to-face with Brodeur during a 5-on-3 Rangers power play and began deliberately raising his stick in the face of Brodeur in an attempt to block his view during the two-man advantage.

Not only did the referees allow Avery to get away with such nonsense — after all, nowhere in the rulebook can you find a two-minute penalty for acting like a punk — no one from the Devils made Avery pay for his schoolyard prank.

And so, NHL schoolmarm Colin Campbell had to put pen to paper Monday and write up what will forever be known as "The Avery Rule." It reads:

"An unsportsmanlike conduct minor penalty will be interpreted and applied, effective immediately, to a situation when an offensive player positions himself facing the opposition goaltender and engages in actions such as waving his arms or stick in front of the goaltender's face, for the purpose of improperly interfering with and/or distracting the goaltender as opposed to positioning himself to try to make a play."

I'd like to recommend an addendum to the rule that would state:

"The offending player is subject to any physical punishment the opposing team deems prudent while the on-ice officials cover their eyes and ears. Any injuries to said player will be adjudicated in the kangaroo court of law."

Two minutes for Avery-ing? C'mon. Don't humor the guy. The next time this punk tarnishes the integrity of the game, toss him from the game and throw away the keys.

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