Michael Ventre

There really is no escaping it. If it isn’t one thing, it’s another. If Jose Canseco isn’t releasing a sequel to his wildly unpopular hunk of publishing trash to keep the steroids story alive, it’s news from Tammy Thomas’ trial, which is supposed to serve as a model for Barry Bonds’ trial.

What isn’t mentioned much as the 2008 baseball season begins is just which players are still taking steroids and other performance-enhancing drugs. The reason? Nobody cares. Bonds is awaiting trial. Roger Clemens is in legal limbo. Kirk Radomski and Brian McNamee have exhausted their 15 minutes. The pages of the Mitchell report are turning yellow with age. And fans are thirsty for baseball. If 115,300 people in Southern California can fill the Los Angeles Coliseum just for an exhibition game, you know the national pastime is healthy.

Instead of zeroing in on more miscreants, petty criminals and downright cheaters, maybe we should be looking at the guys who aren’t taking steroids. We hope.

No one really knows for sure who was taking drugs to get a boost and who wasn’t. That being said, here is a list of the 10 players in baseball we hope, for the sake of the game, have not taken the juice. There’s no way to be certain. But these candidates of clean living have all the earmarks of old schoolers who do things the right way.

Who knows? We can only hope:

ALEX RODRIGUEZ: Yes, there are suspicions. He puts up juicy numbers; in 2007, he whacked 54 home runs and had 156 RBI. He’s big and strong, almost unnaturally so. And no less a scoundrel than Canseco has allegedly said in his latest literary work that he introduced A-Rod to a known supplier of steroids. But Rodriguez has been consistently producing superior numbers for most of his career. In ’96, for instance, he hit 36 home runs and had 123 RBI. So it isn’t like he exhibited a Bonds-like sudden spike in performance. And his name didn’t surface in the BALCO investigation or in the Mitchell report. He’s the biggest star in the game who has yet to face a serious allegation. And if he’s smart enough to stop talking to Scott Boras, he’s smart enough to stay away from steroids.

ALBERT PUJOLS: Maybe if there were a trainer or clubhouse attendant in St. Louis who squealed to George Mitchell, Pujols’ reputation might be tainted. But for now, we’ll have to believe him when he says he didn’t take steroids, or more accurately, when he tells reporters to get lost. Pujols did work with a trainer named Chris Mihlfeld, who was linked to disgraced steroids pin cushion Jason Grimsley. But no proof was ever offered that Pujols used performance-enhancers himself. He was incensed over a report from the Fox affiliate in St. Louis that suggested he would be in the Mitchell report and said, “To cheat in this game, that’s not right.” We believe you, Albert. But don’t tell us. Tell some of your colleagues with abscesses on their buttocks.

MANNY RAMIREZ: The effects of steroids on the human mind are still open to debate. While there is spotty evidence about what steroids and HGH can do to the body, no one is really sure what long-term damage might occur to the brain. Manny’s brain is more of a mystery than the grey matter of other humans. His behavior and demeanor have long been the subject of intense scrutiny among baseball fans as well as many in the medical community. For society’s sake, let’s hope that Manny has opted for the natural route when it comes to training for the season. He is entering the final guaranteed year of his contract and recently switched agents and is now represented by Scott Boras. He may be out of his mind, but that doesn’t mean his body isn’t pure.

DEREK JETER: He is probably the most respected and well-liked player in the game, with the exception of that brief period when he dated Mariah Carey. He is the embodiment of dignity and integrity, so it makes it very difficult to imagine him bending over in a clubhouse toilet stall while some sleazeball trainer jabs him with a syringe. Jeter’s numbers have always been impressive, but they’re not cartoonish. In fact, he’s driven in over 100 RBI only once in his career. So if he was taking steroids, he probably should have taken a name brand rather than a generic. Still, Jeter is one of the good guys who plays the game with passion and who never really does anything stupid or embarrassing, although there was that tax flap in New York. Apparently the only performance enhancing that went on in Jeter’s life involved his accountant and his tax returns.

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