Steve Silverman

Fork it over, Brian.

You made the dastardly mistake of sporting a vitaminwater hat and drinking the product during media day press conferences at the Super Bowl — a little less than three months ago. The NFL is now fining you $100,000.

This was not a uniform violation. This was not helmet-to-helmet contact. This was not the dressing down of an official.

It’s because vitaminwater is not an NFL sponsors. They don’t pay the league millions like Gatorade does. The league does not want non-paying companies getting any free publicity at its grandest event. They can’t hit vitaminwater with any charges, so they are sending a message to would-be enterprisers not to get in bed with any company that is not an “official sponsor” of the NFL.

Roger Goodell has shown he is going to be a commissioner who flexes his muscles. Booting out the league’s criminal element is one thing, but protecting the league’s profit margin is quite another. That’s what Paul Tagliabue did magnificently during his tenure as commissioner and what the league will continue to do. Goodell is focused on keeping the NFL as one of the nation’s most successful businesses, let alone the sports world.

Which means the NFL is not about to let Urlacher set his own agenda.

But the NFL forgot about a few things in deciding to issue this late-coming fine. For one thing, it wreaks of inequity. The league fines players, coaches and team officials on a regular basis. Here are just a few in recent years:

• Cowboys WR Terrell Owens was fined $35,000 for spitting on Falcon CB DeAngelo Hall during a Week 15 game last season.
• Oakland’s Tyler Brayton and Seattle’s Jerramy Stevens scuffled in 2006 when the Raiders and Seahawks met in a Monday night game. Brayton was fined $25,000, Stevens $15,000.
• Saints rookie Reggie Bush was fined $10,000 for wearing adidas cleats during a preseason game against the Titans.
• When Joe Horn whipped out a cell phone and made a call following a touchdown on national television a few years ago, he was fined $30,000
• After holding up a sign that said “Please don’t fine me NFL,” the league fined Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson $10,000.
• When Johnson had his nameplate in the locker room changed from Chad Johnson to OCHO CINCO, the league fined him $5,000.
• When linebacker Joey Porter used a gay slur to insult Cleveland tight end Kellen Winslow last season, the league fined him $10,000.

Urlacher was just doing the league’s bidding by making an appearance at the league-mandated press conference during its pre-Super Bowl week. Since he was actually talking to reporters, he took the step of bringing his own beverage to stay hydrated. Seems like the logical thing to do.

But he had the nerve not to bring Gatorade, the league’s sponsored product. Hence the fine of $100K — though that number does ring a bell.

Two years ago, former Viking head coach Mike Tice admitted to scalping some of the Super Bowl tickets he had been allowed to purchase. It was a truly embarrassing moment for Tice and the league.

The league fined Tice $100,000. The same amount as Urlacher.

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Urlacher and his lawyers should have plenty of room to appeal the fine because being fined $100,000 for apparel isn’t remotely fair, even if the NFL says it’s a standard fine for Super Bowl week. A similar violation during the regular season is $10,000.

Urlacher is not the only Bear who has been fined for wearing the label of a product that did not pay the NFL a sponsorship fee. Former quarterback Jim McMahon was fined $5,000 by Commissioner Pete Rozelle during the 1985 playoffs when he wore an adidas headband.

The next week McMahon wore a headband with “Rozelle” on it — and the commissioner actually got a chuckle out of McMahon’s humor. In the team’s Super Bowl XX victory over the Patriots two weeks later, McMahon wore a headband that advocated juvenile diabetes research funding and Rozelle decided to ignore it.

The Bears won’t need to hold any fundraisers for Urlacher so he can pay the fine. He makes millions on and off the field. Vitaminwater will probably be glad to pay it considering all the extra publicity. But a league that brings in money by the billions looks cheap and shortsighted by such a move.

Goodell is showing that he will protect the profit center. That’s bound to keep him employed for a long, long time.