Mike Celizic

Florida State fans can’t bring themselves to say the F word, not when it’s applied to the football team’s legendary coach Bobby Bowden. It’s not the usual word associated with that letter, but another one that sounds in this case just as nasty — “fire.”

There’s no question Bowden needs to be shuffled off to whatever comes after coaching a football team. He and his teams haven’t been great since the last century, and they’re not getting better.

The Florida State faithful know it, and they’ve even set up a web site to chronicle the failings of the team and lobby for a new coach. Except, instead of naming the site firebobbybowden.com, as is the usual custom, they’re calling it retirecoachbowden.com. It’s hard to tell the difference between retiring and firing in this case, as the fans want the retirement to be imposed on Bowden if he continues to prove to be so incapable of taking hints that with each loss are starting to be as subtle as an earthquake. No matter what they call it, at the end of the day, Bowden won’t have a job.

And his son and offensive coordinator, Jeff Bowden, has to go with him. The father wants Jeff to succeed him and has ignored every suggestion that Jeff Bowden’s grasp of offense is as thorough as a baboon’s grasp of calculus. That can’t happen. Jeff Bowden has had six years to prove himself, and he hasn’t done it.

The Seminoles, which Bobby Bowden had turned into one of the top two or three programs in the nation, are in last place in their division of the ACC. In addition to losses to Clemson and Boston College, they’ve also lost to NC State, which has never been accused of being a football powerhouse.

Bowden no longer really coaches the team anyway. He’s set himself up as sort of the CEO of the program, leaving the offense to the challenged Jeff and the defense to others. What he really enjoys, it seems, is standing on the sidelines on Saturday with the sun shining, the stands full of fans — even disgruntled fans — and a set of headphones on his head.

There’s nothing wrong with that – as long as he keeps getting the job done. A few years ago, I suggested that Penn State should find an honorary position for Joe Paterno that would keep him away from the football team. But Paterno hired better coordinators, gave them control, thought better of his lifetime antipathy towards playing freshmen and started winning again; he’s still getting the job done.

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I said the same about Bowden probably three years ago. Unlike Paterno, he hasn’t turned things around. If anything, they’ve gotten worse.

It is no sin to want to work forever, especially if your job defines you. But, sooner or later, someone tears the jersey off the player who overstays his time and can no longer get the job done. Even Hall of Famers aren’t immune.